Heartbreaking farewell for Pretoria couple and cousin killed in freak N3 crash
Three coffins, each covered with a bunch of flowers, stood in front of a jam-packed Pretoria church on Wednesday.
Inside lay three young people who lost their lives in a car crash on the Free State’s N3, just two days after Christmas.
Zane Hilton lay on the left, his wife Claryke, whom he had married only four months ago, in the middle, and her cousin Ethan Lourens on the right.
Hundreds of family members, friends, colleagues and others deeply moved by the tragedy wept bitterly as they looked at the wooden coffins, knowing full well they would never see their loved ones again.
At the service held at Unite180, Pastor David Grobler told family and friends to find comfort in God during this difficult time.
With tears welling in his eyes, Grobler, a close friend of the Hiltons and Ethan, quoted the Bible, saying it was destined for mankind to die.
He said every single person in the room carried that certainty in their future.
“Grief cannot be written out of your life,” he said, adding that the trio was part of the church.
“Because for it to be written out of your life, you would have to shut down your emotions and feelings,” he said.
“You would have to go through life like a robot or a computer.
“If love is real and true, then grief will be true as well.”
Grobler reminded mourners of the story of Lazarus.
“When Lazarus died, Jesus did not detach himself emotionally,” he said.
“He did not explain the pain away, nor did he say ‘hey, I am God and I am not moved by this loss that you, as humans, perceive in your limitations of the flesh’.
“He was moved.”
He said that because the Bible said “Jesus wept”, he found comfort and reassurance whenever he stood in front of a grave or a tomb.
“The Bible says death is the last enemy that will be destroyed … it is an enemy because death separates mankind from God.”
Choking back tears, Claryke’s sister, Uné, said she had always looked up to her, admiring her strong faith and the way she dedicated every part of her life to it.
She described Claryke, 25, as a woman who put God first and said they shared a very close, special bond.
“Her kindness and love touched everyone around her,” she said.
Claryke was a teacher and part of Unite180.
A friend who met Claryke through one of the church’s uGroups also spoke, saying her love for and dedication to the Lord were truly inspiring and something everyone could look up to.
A uGroup is a small home-based church group where members meet regularly to pray, study the Bible, and support one another.
A cousin of Zane’s said that heaven was livelier now with him there.
“I am here not only as a cousin, but as someone who was incredibly blessed to have known Zane,” she said of Zane, 25, who was also a uGroup leader.
“He always had a joke ready, a smile waiting; no matter what was going on, he could make things lighter.
“Zane had the rare gift of being able to talk to anyone and was always an integral part of family gatherings, often being the entertainer, storyteller and the one playing games with the kids while we watched and laughed.
“He loved every single one of his family members, making sure to spend time with all of us. He showed us how much he cared.”
Zane’s stepbrother said the two of them clicked instantly.
“We formed an instant and lasting connection,” he said.
“It didn’t take long for me to realise that I loved everything about Zane.
“He had an incredible character, something everyone who met him knew and loved.
“Very few people could light up the room like he did.”
He said that later, when Zane met Claryke, he proved every stereotype true about how deeply a strong man can fall in love.
“Time and time again, he showed us how he loved the warm, gentle, and soothing spirit that we came to know as the beautiful Claryke.
“Together their smiles grew wider, deeper, and brighter.”
Ethan’s cousin, Jonathan, said the two of them had a close bond.
He said they used to live together with their grandmother.
“I could ask him anything,” he said of the 20-year-old, who managed a restaurant and had lofty goals of one day owning a few of his own.
“We had many late-night conversations.
“During the Covid-19 nationwide lockdown, I would always burst into his room.
“I feel sorry for him having to put up with me. We would talk for hours, or he would just listen to me.”
He said he was going to miss his cousin and added that Ethan was a man deeply in tune with his faith.
Ethan’s friend, Tanya van den Berg, said she was grateful to have known him.
“All of us here today are so lucky that he played such a big role in all of our lives,” she said.
“If Ethan taught me anything in life, it was how to put others before yourself.
“When Ethan had nothing, he gave me everything. He showed me that age was never a barrier to dreams and ambitions.
“As one quote says: ‘Love does not end with dying or leave with the last breath. For someone you’ve loved deeply, love doesn’t end with death.”
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